Product Placement
by lezcheck
Summary: Bo and Lauren receive some surprising gifts via an interdimensional portal.


Lauren leaned back on the couch, tucked a blanket around her legs, and sighed contentedly as Bo dug through the container on the coffee table.

"There's some really trippy shit in here," Bo said, removing an object from the beat-up cardboard box. "What is this?"

Lauren glanced at it as she sipped from her wineglass. "That's an exclusive Star Trek phaser universal remote control replica," she said. "You can program it to work with your TV, and then every time you want to change the channel, you can say 'set phasers to Animal Planet' or whatever it is you're planning to watch."

Bo nodded slowly. "I'll definitely be doing that," she said in a tone that indicated she definitely would not. She placed it on the coffee table and turned back to the box.

Lauren picked up the phaser replica, holding it with admiration. "I still don't understand how all of this stuff suddenly appeared in the Dal. Or why Trick gave it to us."

Bo shrugged. "He said that at certain times of the year, the borders between dimensions are thin. And he gave it to me because it had our names on it."

"Shouldn't that make you worry?" Lauren asked. "Usually anonymous packages don't contain anything good. Beware Greeks bearing gifts."

"Trick isn't Greek," Bo said. "And anyway, he checked it out and said there wasn't anything dangerous in it. Maybe, for once, someone wanted to send us something fun."

"They're off to a good start," Lauren said, aiming the phaser at the TV.

"Hey, check these out!" Bo said, removing two garments from the box. She shook them to unfold them and held one up to her chest. She frowned at the words, reading them upside down. "What's a fangirl?"

Lauren looked at the shirt Bo was holding. It was a black, v-neck shirt with the word "FANGIRL" across the chest. The word "FAN" was in white letters, and the "GIRL" was in an attractive shade of blue. It occurred to Lauren that it was the exact shade of blue that Bo's eyes turned when she was in full succubus chi-suck mode.

"A fangirl is a girl or woman who is really passionate about something," Lauren said.

"Like I am about you?" Bo asked with a grin. "Am I a Lauren Lewis fangirl?"

"Sort of," Lauren laughed. "Usually it refers to being a fan of a TV show, or a band, or something. But you can define it however you want."

"Well, there are two of these shirts, and they look like they're our sizes," Bo said. "Shall we put them on?"

"Is it too cutesy if we're dressed alike?" Lauren asked. "Kenzi will never let us hear the end of it."

"Kenzi went out, and I doubt she'll be back until after we've been in bed for a while," Bo said.

"I'm not really that tired," Lauren said. "It's only 8 o'clock."

"I didn't say we were going to _sleep,"_ Bo said, and removed her tank top in one smooth motion. Before Lauren could properly appreciate the view, Bo had donned the shirt that said FANGIRL.

"Wow, this is really soft and comfortable," Bo said. She wriggled her shoulders in pleasure.

Lauren looked at the label on the shirt she was holding. "No wonder. It's 100% combed ringspun cotton." She looked over at Bo. "That V-neck is really showcasing your cleavage to its full extent, too."

"Put yours on!" Bo said. Lauren complied.

"I think this is my new favorite T-shirt," Lauren said. "What else is in that box?"

Bo scooted the box closer to her and took out the rest of the items one by one. She piled up several DVD box sets, a hefty stack of papers, a book, two CDs and two boxes of dark chocolate covered caramels from Trader Joe's.

"What the Marie Curie?" Lauren said, picking up the DVDs. "There's a picture of you on this! And Dyson and Kenzi."

Bo read the title aloud.

"Lost Girl, Season One." She raised her eyebrows.

"This just got weird," Lauren said.

"It was already weird when I pulled out a Star Trek phaser remote control," Bo said. She opened the DVD case, and a folded piece of paper fell out. She unfolded it and read the handwritten words:

 _"Dear Bo and Lauren,_

 _Hello! We recently discovered an interdimensional portal from our world to yours that opens once every six years. Don't freak out, but in our world, your lives are a TV show. A TV show that we LOVE. It has inspired so many people to do so many things, and changed our lives._

 _There's a Fae in your world who lives off the energy we generate from fangirling about you, and she's the one who communicates all of your life stories to the people in our world who make the TV show._

 _Anyway, long story short, we wanted to send you some stuff to show you what an effect you've had on us and to say thank you. Hope you enjoy!_

 _Sincerely,_

 _Some MAJOR Doccubus fangirls."_

"What's a Doccubus?" Bo said.

"I think it's a portmanteau," Lauren said. "It must be because I'm a doctor, and you're a succubus."

They looked at each other.

"Cute," Bo said. "But what about my name for us? BoLo?"

"I love that name, honey, I do. But it kind of sounds like one of those string ties," Lauren said. "So should we watch an episode?" She held up the first season of Lost Girl.

"Sure," Bo said. "But how exciting will it be to watch ourselves? We already know what happened. At least they also sent candy."

She settled back on the couch and broke into a box of the caramels as Lauren booted up the DVD player and programmed the Star Trek remote to control both it and the television.

"Set phasers to…Doccubus."

 _Nine hours later_

"Holy crap," Lauren said. "It's five in the morning. I can't believe we watched the whole thing."

The women lay back on the couch with two empty caramel boxes littering the floor. A very drunk Kenzi had come home a little after midnight, had looked at Bo and Lauren in their matching shirts, seen herself on the TV screen, and mumbled something about swearing off absinthe forever before stumbling up to her room.

"But it was SO GOOD!" Bo said. "I can't believe Trick and Dyson, though. It was infuriating. If they had just told me what was going on, we could have saved so much time."

"I could have done without seeing so much of you and Dyson in bed together, frankly," Lauren said. "Some things cannot be unseen."

"But honey, all of that just led me to you. And that sex scene with us was way hotter."

"Except for the aftermath," Lauren said. "I'm still sorry about that."

"Don't apologize," Bo said. "The Ash put you in an impossible position. I understand that so much better now."

"Should we go to bed?"

"Probably," Bo replied. "Let's just see what the rest of this stuff is first." She picked up the CDs. "Someone burned these from a computer. What does this say? 'Drinks at the Dal?' Maybe it's some cocktail recipes."

"I don't think so," Lauren said. "It says right here that it's a podcast way station for Lost Girl fans."

"What's a podcast?" Bo asked.

"Really?" Lauren said.

Bo ignored her and picked up the sheaf of papers. "This is a bunch of printouts," she said, scanning the first page. "Too Many Cocks In The Hen-House? What?"

Lauren looked over Bo's shoulder and read aloud.

 _"'I seriously cannot fucking believe this is happening,' Bo said through gritted teeth. Her hands pressed against the wall, feet spread wide beside the other three women as the officers ransacked the house looking for more contraband."_

Bo frowned. "What? This never happened. You and I were never with…" she scanned the page, "Kenzi and Evony in Arizona getting busted for having too many sex toys. Is this predicting the future?"

Lauren laughed. "I don't think so. I think this is fan fiction."

"What's fan fiction?"

"It's when fans of a show write stories about the characters, but they diverge from the plotline in the actual show. Sometimes it's about exploring relationships that the show doesn't decide to have, and sometimes it's about imagining different scenarios. I've read quite a bit of fanfic, actually."

"Have you ever written any?"

"No," Lauren said quickly.

Bo gave her a look.

"Well, some. But you can't read it until you watch most of TNG and all of Voyager, and seasons 4 and 5 of Deep Space Nine, or else you won't get it."

"Yes, and I promise to watch Star Wars as soon as possible," Bo said. "Once we're finished averting the apocalypse."

"I've heard that before," Lauren muttered under her breath.

Bo flipped through the pages. "Wow. In this one, I'm a firefighter and you're an ER doctor. In this one, I'm an advertising executive and you're a stripper!" she shrieked. "Let's read it, and act it out."

"Later," Lauren said. "Look, in this one we're transported aboard the starship Voyager!" She chortled.

Kenzi's annoyed voice floated down the stairs. "Can you two keep it down, please? I'm trying to not puke in my bed."

"Sorry, Kenz!" Bo called upstairs. "Lauren, we've been up all night. We should get at least a little sleep, don't you think?"

Lauren looked up from the book she had opened. On the cover were two women in silhouette, one astride a horse, carrying a rifle and wearing a cowgirl hat. The other held the reins and was wearing a dress.

"Somewhere Between Love And Justice, by S.W. Anderson," Bo read. "Is this about us too?"

"I think so, and I'm a sucker for a western," Lauren said. "Let's just read one chapter before we go to sleep. We can read it together."

"As long as we read it naked in bed, that sounds great," Bo said. She gathered up the papers and DVDs and put them back into the box, and tucked the box underneath the coffee table. "I don't want to give Kenzi a shock by leaving this out for her to find. With the hangover she probably has, who knows what could happen."

Bo headed for the stairs. A stray paper that she had missed when cleaning up fluttered to the ground. Lauren picked it up and read the heading.

"PWP," she read, and glanced at the first few paragraphs.

"Oh boy, yes," she said, and ran to catch up with Bo.

She thought they wouldn't be getting to sleep anytime soon, after all.

THE END


End file.
